James sat at his desk, leaning back with his feet propped. He had plenty of homework to do that he should be working on, but he couldn’t concentrate. He was too concerned with Danny. He didn’t know what to do to help her anymore. But he didn’t want to give up. Even though it was perfectly clear to everyone else that had seen her in the last few days that she’d given up on herself.
He heard someone coming up the stairs and he opened a textbook so it wouldn’t look like he was just wasting time. His parents hated it when he just stared at the wall when he should be studying. They wanted him to go far with his education and make something of himself. Or something.
The footsteps came to a stop before they passed his bedroom. It must have been one of his parents checking on Danny. Most likely his mom, of course. His dad wouldn’t have made that attempt at showing he cared.
Then he hear a scream and jumped to his feet. He ran to the hall and saw his mother standing in the hall with her hands over her mouth. She was still screaming.
James pushed past her and saw Danny dangling from the beam supporting the ceiling. His stomach churned and he thought he might be sick, but her feet her were still moving. There might still be time…
He grabbed her waist and supported her weight on his shoulder to relieve the pressure on her neck. His dad appeared in the door a second later and ran to help him get her down.
“Maddie, call 9–1–1! Keep Allison downstairs!” Jack shouted and Maddie finally moved from her place in the hall.
Danny’s eyelids fluttered and James found a weak pulse at her wrist. Maybe they’d gotten her down in time.
After they’d settled her on the bed, James stumbled backwards. He barely made it to the bathroom before he was sick. He heaved out everything he could remember eating that day along with some extra. When the convulsions slowed, he curled into a ball on the floor.
The ambulance arrived before James could get himself off the ground. He heard shouting and people running up and down the stairs. Then a knock on the bathroom door.
“James?” His mother, voice shaking. “We’re going to the hospital. Do you want to come or stay here?” He could almost hear the sound of the tears falling from her eyes.
“Coming.” He grabbed the counter and dragged himself up. He splashed water on his face and opened the door.
He put his arm around his mother and they supported each other down the stairs and out to the car. Jack and Allison were already there waiting for them. Allison’s face was pale as a sheet, her mouth shut in a tight line. Jack looked like he was in shock.
They drove in silence behind the ambulance. Jack kept shaking his head and running a hand through his hair. James felt relieved that this father was upset about this. All along he’d thought his dad despised Danny.
Dr. Jean met them in the waiting room while Danny was rushed away on a stretcher. He looked stricken.
“I am so sorry,” he said in a shaky voice. “I never thought… I’m sorry.”
The family sat down and Dr. Jean paced in front of them while they waited. James found the energy to glare at the doctor. This had to be his fault. He was supposed to make Danny better.
-
A nurse approached them after what felt like several hours.
“Are you all Danielle’s family?”
“Danny,” Jack corrected and James rounded on him in shock. But no one else paid any mind to his correction.
“Well, she’s regained consciousness. We haven’t found any lasting damage so far. We expect her to make full recovery.” She turned to Dr. Jean. “You’ll be asked in to speak with her first so you can decide on the next action for her case.” The nurse walked away.
The family stared at Dr. Jean as he wrung his hands.
“I really am sorry,” he said again. “I wouldn’t have released her to you if I thought she’d do this. She reassured me on many occasions that she wasn’t suicidal.”
“But that was before the procedure failed, right?” Maddie asked. “You told us that before.”
“Well, yes, I suppose you have a point.”
“You should have talked to her about it again then!” Jack snapped.
“Dr. Jean,” the nurse reappeared in the hall, “we need you now.”
Dr. Jean couldn’t get up and away from the family fast enough, his guilt etched into every line on his face.
“James…” Maddie said, “take your sister home so she can get some sleep. We’ll call you when we know something and you can come back to get us.” She handed him the car keys.
“But I-”
“Go son,” Jack interrupted. “It won’t help her for you two to be sleep deprived. Go on home.”
James stood and took his little sister’s hand to lead her to the car. Neither of them spoke on the way home. Allison was still tight-lipped and pale. She had her arms crossed and stared out the window.
—
When they walked through the door, James felt a heavy weight hit him in the chest. It felt so wrong to be there without Danny. He didn’t even know if she would ever come back here. Allison walked forward away from him, but stopped at the foot of the stairs to turn around. Tears glistened in her eyes.
“Will Danny be okay?” She sobbed.
James put his arms around her and held her tight for the first time in a long time. He cried with her. He didn’t know what to tell her. He was scared, but couldn’t say it out loud.
“I hope so,” he finally mumbled into her hair.
-
When Allison went up to her room, James called Jacki and Sebastian and asked them to come over. They were there faster than he’d expected. They’d never heard him sound so desperate before. They sat in the living room and waited for him to tell them what was going on. He hadn’t been able to explain over the phone. This was something you did in person.
“James…” Jacki said after a few silent minutes had gone by, “where are your parents?”
“Yeah, and where’s Danny?” Sebastian added.
James put is head in his hands and his shoulders shook with suppressed sobs. “They’re… they’re all at the hospital.”
“What? Why?”
“What happened?”
There was a long pause, then Jacki walked over to him to put a hand on his shoulder. Sebastian hovered behind her.
“Danny…” James said and then choked on another sob. “She… she tried to kill herself.”
Jacki’s legs gave out and she fell to the floor with her hands over her mouth. Sebastian jaw dropped and he slowly sank to the couch next to James. Jacki began to cry silently, staring at James for more of an explanation.
“You… you said tried,” she said when he didn’t offer anything more. “So does that mean… she’s not… not dead?”
“She’s alive,” James mumbled. “My parents are with her. They made me bring Allison home.”
“So… so she’ll be okay?” Jacki clutched at James’ hand desperately.
“I don’t know. The nurse said that so far they hadn’t found any permanent damage. But we didn’t get to talk to her before I left.”
“Was she awake?”
“They said she was. But the shrink had to talk to her first. Something about deciding on what ‘action’ to take. Whatever that means.”
Jacki shrugged and nodded and turned to Sebastian, realizing he hadn’t said anything so far. She reached for one of his hands too and gave it a squeeze. He blinked, coming out of his daze, and tears fell from his eyes as he looked down at her hand.
The phone rang a moment later and they jumped. James reached out to answer it.
“Hello?” He said, his voice cracking. “Okay…” pause. “Does she have to?” Pause. “Okay.” He grabbed a pen and wrote on the notepad near the phone. “Are you sure?” Then. “Okay, see you when you get home.” He hung up and then looked at his friends. “Well, she’s okay. But she has to be checked into a psychiatric hospital. No one can see her. They don’t think it will do any good yet. But my mom gave me the address for where she’ll be and said you can write her letters.” He copied the address onto separate pages and gave them each one.
Sebastian stared at his blankly and then looked back up at James, fresh tears on his cheeks. “She’s okay?”
“Yes. And she’s going to get real help. No more fake procedures. She’s going to get better.”
“Promise?” Allison was in the doorway.
James had no idea how long she’d been standing there. She was in her pajamas and holding a stuffed bear, but she didn’t show any signs of having actually tried to go to sleep.
James held out his hand and she hurried over to hug him.
“I promise,” he said.